Journey to Motherhood.

April 2014 in the toilet of my workplace, a positive pregnancy test in my hand.  I had a thousand thoughts running through my head (cliche I know) but I was happy.  I wasn’t sure how the next nine months of life would unfold but  I did know that a little human currently setting up camp would be brought into a world filled with love.

Fast forward 20 weeks, August 27th 2014, and I can put a gender to my growing belly. A baby girl – and that was a shock. My boyfriend’s family predominantly boys. It took a while to get our head around the fact we now had a daughter rather than an ‘it’. We had only discussed boys names, so this opened a whole new can of worms. Who knew choosing a name for your child could be so difficult? I mean this is naming somebody – it’s a pretty big decision. It’s what that person is going to be judged on first and foremost, before anyone knows anything about them. It’s what you know before you actually know the character of the person. It’s a lot of pressure.

30 weeks pregnant and looking at a 4D image of my daughter on the screen. How surreal? How can that even be possible? Seeing a little face, little expressions, stretches all happening live within my body at that moment in time. What didn’t make me happy however was losing my phone in all the excitement – and that set off a pregnancy hormonal break down, thinking I’d lost precious memories and photographs. BUT faith in humanity was restored, someone found my phone and gave my boyfriend (who had been constantly phoning it to see if anyone picks up) a phone call back. Off topic from pregnancy, but lovely when something like that happens.

40 weeks pregnant and 3 days. Labour. It was a pain that I couldn’t imagine, that you cannot explain, but it was a pain that was so rewarding and worth it. I definitely believe in mind over matter, and that helped me. I had a tough pregnancy, having to leave work early and then finding out I had PGP left me overthinking that the delivery would be a bad experience. I wasn’t scared of labour. I knew there would be pain, I expected it and I welcomed it (especially when you can’t get your own socks on in a morning). I was contracting from the Friday at around 2pm, irregularly but throughout the day they were slowly becoming steadier. By 11pm, I had to discretely leave a family dinner and try to rest. I couldn’t sleep though. My contractions at this point were around every 15 minutes, but slowly they got nearer, but still irregular in length. By 2am I was having them every 10 minutes but they were only lasting around 30 – 40 seconds. The hospital wanted me to try and get them to last 1 minute. None the less I was advised to go up and went up anyway. I had this great pregnancy app on my phone called Pregnancy Plus, it helped me make lists and even time my contractions. Check out NetMums Top Pregnancy Apps if you’re looking to download one.

I arrived at my maternity unit and get checked over. Yep I was in labour, but they couldn’t feel my cervix at all. I still don’t understand how it had completely vanished. An hour walk later and still they couldn’t feel anything. 4am, I went home, exhausted and feeling deflated. I was having the pain, contractions, the timings added up but because they couldn’t feel my cervix. At home I was pacing around. I tried a bath, I could literally sit in a bath all day, I love them and heard they work wonders during labour. Bath ran, hop in….HATE IT.

By 11am I was crawling on the floor, deep breaths and everything. My contractions were still only about 10 minutes apart but lasting well over a minute. My boyfriend was urging me to go back to the hospital but I wanted to stay home as long as I could, I couldn’t have myself feel deflated again. He phoned and I was back at the hospital but this time in the birthing centre. I was admitted at 12pm and then I started pushing at around 3pm. By 3.50pm I had my beautiful baby girl.

I did it. I gave birth. No pain relief, stood up and hardly any shouting and screaming. I’m pretty proud about that. They forget to mention the aftermath of birth though, the blood, the pads, the stinging when you go for a wee. Wow, it really was something. But it was something that I was so special to experience and I was so blessed to have the experience I did. Almost 10 months on and I still look at this so fondly and I always will.

Now having a newborn, then a 6 month old crawler turn into a 9 month cruiser is another story….. watch this space!

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

12 thoughts on “Journey to Motherhood.

  1. athomewiththeboys2015

    Pregnancy, what can I say? My wife keeps telling me (even after all this time) that I’ll never understand how much pain she went through. And thinking about it, she’s absolutely right!

    I remember both occasions when we looked at the little blue line on the pregnancy tester. Each one provided us with different experiences, one of expectation, whilst the other was of shock, tears and joy.

    Whilst my defence as a man is “It’s not my fault that’s all I have to do”, deep down, I do actually feel for you Ladies that have to go through the experience of pregnancy.

    I also believe this is why there is a stronger bond between Mother and child than that of Father and child. Mothers have had nine months longer to get to know their child.

    Thanks for sharing. Nice post. #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a lovely post!! It is such an experience having kids right? You are so brave, you managed the whole labour without epidural! wow!! I had a totally different experience than you. My first time, wasn’t that straight forward as I was in labour for 24 hrs!! Oh Dear that was eternal!! I asked for a epidural as I was really suffering. And at the end I had an emergency c-section as my baby was in distressed! The whole experience for me was traumatic so for my 2nd time around I had a programmed c-section and everything went so smooth and easy!! I was back home the next day!! All went great! I had 2 opposite experiences! So crazy right? Thanks so much for sharing this at #KCACOLS. I’m so happy to have you here! 🙂 xx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. What a lovely post to read! Sounds like you had a really good experience (and I totally agree with you about after the birth – I had an almost-third degree tear (“with branches” apparently) and god recovering from the birth was a nightmare! #KCACOLS

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Oh my God I so needed to read this post this morning! I am 39+2 (although we think they cocked up my due date and more likely to be 39+5) and patiently (!) waiting for my first baby. I love your honesty in this post and reading something like this makes me feel less scared and more confident about impending labour. Thank you so much for sharing and now I’m going to have a read of your other posts. Xxx #justanotherlinky

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks again. Just keep that realistic thought in your head. It’s going to hurt, but we are mad to deal with this….and if it was terrible and not bearable then we wouldn’t ever have more than one baby. I’m sure your going to be fantastic and I can’t wait to read about your experience! X

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Lovely birth story and great first birth experience! Well done you, im so impressed!! Im hoping for something like that the next time round, I wasnt so lucky with my first. They say no two births are the same so im really hoping thats true 🙂 Emily #KCACOLS.

    Liked by 1 person

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